Tj Host

Wedding Ideas & Inspiration
Married as a same sex couple, love kept them together through a gender change

Married as a same sex couple, love kept them together through a gender change


Lynn: Jennifer and I met and you know how you click with people? We became instant friends. She mentioned she had a transgender husband and I said… What?
She mentioned she had a transgender husband and I said… What? I think one of the first things she mentioned, besides the fact he was transgender was the fact that they were married as a same sex couple.
I think one of the first things she mentioned, besides the fact he was transgender was the fact that they were married as a same sex couple. Jennifer: I think that we knew we were a good match right from the start. We moved in together after the first year.
Jennifer: I think that we knew we were a good match right from the start. We moved in together after the first year. Marc: We were “friends.” Jennifer: We were friends because my parents still didn’t know. I hadn’t come out to them yet. At the time it wasn’t legal. Marc: Yeah, gay marriage wasn’t legal.
At the time it wasn’t legal. Marc: Yeah, gay marriage wasn’t legal. Jennifer: We had our wedding where we weren’t legally married in September. It was beautiful and exactly how I wanted it to be. Jennifer: I wasn’t expecting it at all. He had been going through some therapy because I knew he felt a lot of social anxiety and was struggling with that. Marc: I don’t know if I necessarily knew right away that I was male. I just always felt different or odd.
Marc: I don’t know if I necessarily knew right away that I was male. I just always felt different or odd. Even when I came out as a lesbian, I didn’t feel that label – as much as I hate labels – I didn’t feel like that aligned with who I was.
Even when I came out as a lesbian, I didn’t feel that label – as much as I hate labels – I didn’t feel like that aligned with who I was. I came across a documentary on the Logo channel actually. Finally, it came to light and was really like, oh this is how I’m feeling and all of that stuff.
I came across a documentary on the Logo channel actually. Finally, it came to light and was really like, oh this is how I’m feeling and all of that stuff. It was really just like this moment of clarity. But do I want to basically, potentially ruin my entire marriage? It was just a lot of back and forth.
But do I want to basically, potentially ruin my entire marriage? It was just a lot of back and forth. So, I was like, ‘Oh you should watch this video. This bit of the documentary.’ Basically was telling her, ‘This is how I feel.’ Jennifer: I didn’t understand… like I didn’t get it.
Basically was telling her, ‘This is how I feel.’ Jennifer: I didn’t understand… like I didn’t get it. I didn’t understand how somebody could feel that way. Like, this isn’t happening. This isn’t real. This isn’t going to be my life. Lynn: When Jennifer was going through the process of coming to terms with Marc’s decision She went through hell. She went into cutting and anorexia and deep, deep depression and really felt very alone, like nobody else in the whole world would understand what she was going through. Jennifer: We both questioned whether or not I would be able to remain in the relationship. Marc: It was hard because seeing her and knowing that she’s struggling
Jennifer: We both questioned whether or not I would be able to remain in the relationship. Marc: It was hard because seeing her and knowing that she’s struggling and I felt really bad about that but I was also excited at the same time that I was going forward with whatever the process of my transition was going to be
and I felt really bad about that but I was also excited at the same time that I was going forward with whatever the process of my transition was going to be and that I finally realized who I was. Jennifer: It took realizing that although there were a lot of changes, when it came down to it, he was really the same person. And I loved him for who he was. No matter what. And I didn’t know whether that was something that I could do.
And I loved him for who he was. No matter what. And I didn’t know whether that was something that I could do. There were a lot of times where I wasn’t happy and I was very uncomfortable. But I never stopped loving him. Lynn: There are a lot of people who would’ve thrown up their hands and said, ‘Absolutely not.’
But I never stopped loving him. Lynn: There are a lot of people who would’ve thrown up their hands and said, ‘Absolutely not.’ This is not what I signed up for. This is not what I want.
Lynn: There are a lot of people who would’ve thrown up their hands and said, ‘Absolutely not.’ This is not what I signed up for. This is not what I want. The fact that she was even willing to try. That to me was so special, so unusual.
This is not what I signed up for. This is not what I want. The fact that she was even willing to try. That to me was so special, so unusual. I kept putting myself in her shoes and thinking, I don’t know if I could do that. Jennifer: We both kind of decided we didn’t care what label you wanted to slap on it. It was what it was and love is love. Lynn: I was awestruck at everything that she had gone through
It was what it was and love is love. Lynn: I was awestruck at everything that she had gone through at everything this couple had gone through. And I just said, ‘You got to let me tell your story.’
at everything this couple had gone through. And I just said, ‘You got to let me tell your story.’ There are a lot of books out there by the trans community written from their perspective.
There are a lot of books out there by the trans community written from their perspective. There are very few books out there that are from the partner’s perspective.
written from their perspective. There are very few books out there that are from the partner’s perspective. Jennifer: It ended up being amazingly therapeutic to re-tell some of the more difficult things about the transition and our journey. Because I was telling it from being in a much better place.
to re-tell some of the more difficult things about the transition and our journey. Because I was telling it from being in a much better place. Lynn: The biggest blessing I could’ve asked for is to know in
Because I was telling it from being in a much better place. Lynn: The biggest blessing I could’ve asked for is to know in trying to help somebody else, this also helped her… who could ask for anything more?
trying to help somebody else, this also helped her… who could ask for anything more? Jennifer: Truly it was just the love that we had for each other and the support we were willing to give one another. In all the times I felt like I needed to support him in his transition
and the support we were willing to give one another. In all the times I felt like I needed to support him in his transition he was supporting me in helping me through my struggles. There’s really no other way to say it or describe it
he was supporting me in helping me through my struggles. There’s really no other way to say it or describe it just true love saw us through.
There’s really no other way to say it or describe it just true love saw us through.

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