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Would a wife date, marry or be friend a foreigner? Japanese wives on relationships with foreigners.

Would a wife date, marry or be friend a foreigner? Japanese wives on relationships with foreigners.


Would you date a foreigner? – I want him to make me swoon with sweet words. Sooo coool!!! – That was their reaction to Will Smith in suits. Hey girls and guys on Ask Japanese it’s Cathy Cat. We went to the streets of Tokyo and asked two married ladies, if they could travel back in time, how far could they go with a foreigner. Friendship, Dating or even marriage are on the table, let’s see what they would actually do with a foreigner if they had had that chance in their younger years. Also don’t forget before we start the video to subscribe to our channel for more videos and interviews from Japan and tick on the notification symbol so you don’t miss any of the new videos that we bring out to you, almost every day. Let’s go and Ask Japanese. We are currently asking how far you would go with a foreigner. One is friends, second is dating, third is marriage. How far do you think you could go? Please make your vote… Please draw a line where you can… I would actually love to date one! But I can’t speak another language so a dotted line… So dating – That’s my limit. – What if he could speak Japanese fluently? Would that change? – That would be great! Then I would marry them too. So language. – Language is super important. – I don’t like lovey-dovey-ness. I could not deal with it. My husband is super conservative… like a samurai. He is very traditional. Even my parents say his thinking is even older than theirs. I am used to that now. – No I… You don’t want to hear sweet words? – I can’t deal with that at all. I would get too flustered. Men could be my friends or date me a little. So lets go from the start. Friendship. I want to become friends with someone like you straight away. – Thank you so much. I want to hang out with foreigners and see what other things you think are fun in Japan and what you like, I want to talk lots with foreigners. But I don’t know where to meet them. So meeting foreigners is hard? – I can see some walking around town but… I don’t know who to talk to in order to become friends. I wish there was a bar for that or something. – A chance to make friends. – I want to make foreign friends. I- I want to hang out with you! – want to hang out with you too! – So friendship is ok Friendship is fine. I am shy but I want to talk with many people I like chatting and hear people’s thoughts. What do you want to do with your foreign friend? I want to walk around town. Look at shops. Eat crepe. I want to do the things we generally do, like the office… I want to go into town, have tea and find out what foreigners enjoy doing Game centers or amusement parks are ok too. I want them to enjoy it all to the fullest and join in. I think I would learn a lot if I was with a foreigner. They know so much about our life. Things we don’t see anymore in our day to day They look at a lot of things. There are so many things to spot in Japan I want them to tell me about it. – So the things you know about Japan… you might find out new things now? I want to be moved by the things they see as valuable. – Next up is dating. You want to date one? – I want him to make me swoon with sweet words. So dating is fine? – I think that’s the limit of how far I could go. I am curious what foreigners are like when it’s just the two of us, not friends… I want to experience it at least once. How are they really? How sweet or caring they really? Or are they actually really cold and such. I am curious to try that. What is the image that Japanese people have of dating foreigners? Foreign girls seem to be very intelligent, when I see the couples. Girls seem to be very much above their partners. I envy that. They look so cool. I want to do that too. I think the opposite. Boys seem to be players… If you don’t work in a language environment, there isn’t much chance to meet foreigners and going to those places, there are many very forward men. They seem to be players. Their idea of dating seems to be a bit more free than ours. So you both have different ideas. Last one… marriage. If you could go back in time… What do you think you marriage to a foreigners could be like? – As long as we can communicate. My friend married a foreigner but at first they couldn’t communicate. She said she had a really hard time. Communication is the most important. Also… things like passports and difficult things like that. Those things need to be cleared first but then I would welcome a foreigner as my husband. So first you drew a dotted line – It depends if he speaks my language. He needs to try his best and speak Japanese. – So he could meet my parents too. And I would visit his family too. – And you can’t go that far? Why? I am not brave enough. I don’t know much about Japanese men… so I don’t know if I could live with someone from a different culture for ever. I would be so worried. I think it would take a lot of dates to convince me otherwise I would need to feel like it works. – What ideal dream of a foreign husband do you have? Asian men look similar to Japanese men therefore I would like to see a man who looks non-asian and foreign straight away. I would like to date him. – See a clear difference. – Yes. – I want a dark skinned… business man. They are so cool. – I see. They look so stylish and attractive in suits. When I see them in town, my eyes follow them. Sooo coool!!! – The director said “Will Smith in suits” and this was their reaction. So cool! I want to walk next to him in town. – Thank you so much. I learned a lot. Will Smith wearing suits, that was an interesting outcome at the end. These two ladies as you can see have very different family situations. While one had a husband that was more open, the other one had a very strict, very traditional culture husband and she said she preferred it that way. She said she would not be able to deal with this… sweet words and sweet loving that a foreigner might be able to give her but she still said she is curious about how foreigners are when it’s just the two of you. You might have a chance to be around friends, meet them, but how are they when it’s just you and them. Will they act differently and how would that make you feel? You can see that she was curious but she preferred her current hubby, which we won’t judge her for right?! There also seem to be very different images of how foreigners are with their partners. For example, one image was that one lady has is the girls seem to be very strong in the relationship and very clever while the other had the image that the guys seem to be more players meaning like you know they gather a lot of different experiences. Interesting to see. However language seems to be the most important factor. You could see that the lady on the left said… if you can’t speak the language she has to re-consider marriage but if the partner can speak the language and is knowledgable in Japanese culture as well, that would work out. So guys, don’t forget to brush up your Japanese skills. There is always the question, can you be able to live in another culture or just experience another culture meaning… just go there for a couple of weeks or be able to live there. That is probably one of the biggest challenges when you actually intend to not just date a partner but also marry a partner. At that point in time, especially in Japanese culture, you get connected not only to your partner but also your partners family so you have to deal with a lot more requests, values and things you might have to sacrifice in order to stay together. So these are a couple of things from these two ladies but we asked this to other younger people on the streets in Harajuku as well. If you would like to see that video… don’f forget to click on the notification symbol because we are going to bring that out soon. Thank you for watching and I catch you soon for another video on Ask Japanese. Bye.

36 comments found

  1. The first woman in the white is super nice and adorable. I hope she meets a great guy, whether it be japanese or a foreign man. ☺️

  2. Personally, I think people generalize too much. Just as we see here that two Japanese gentlemen are, according to their wives, quite different, any two foreigners are likely to be quite different too and consequently, just getting to know one person, won't tell you about the entire group.

    It was interesting to see how these women felt about what is important to them in a relationship. I was surprised to learn that one of the women wasn't interested in a man who sweet talks her, now I'll wonder what kinds of words she does want to hear.

    Thanks. I learned something too.

  3. I’m from Argentina and I love my culture, I don’t know if i want to change it for another culture so… i wouldn’t married with a foreign but we can be friends 🙂

  4. It really depends on the person. It is nice hearing stories or interest of people from another culture. However, they may or may not represent japanese people in general. They are nice and open about their interests and likes. Being friends, dating and or marriage are interchangeable, yet they are really different at the same time. The point is that japanese people can be shy and the practical way to meet and socialize with them would be being introduced by a friends, Co workers or gatherings or meet ups. Many, many, many, many factors are in place so in the end just be respectful to the person and their culture in general.

  5. I find it a little sad the woman on the right isn't so much into feelings, I agree the lovely dovey stuff can get on ones nerves, but judging by how she looks up to how strict her husband is, …it seems questionable.

    It also kinda sets a bad example for the youth not knowing how to properly act or understand other's or their own feelings growing up.

  6. Are you jewish i have seen you with a star of david necklace several times, or is it just the Japanese style of wearing foreign iconography?

  7. It can be that way sometimes. If one has their mind open to more than Japanese. They can see that there is more out there than what they are used to. But even though I said that. Sometimes just their own is what they prefer. ☺

  8. People trying to bring diversity to Japan are not friends of the Japanese. Japan is wonderful, because it’s predominantly Japanese. If people try to change that it’ll be mess like America, and England.

  9. I don't know part of me would want to marry. But that's just a piece of paper. I really just want to love someone forever.

  10. I liked the lady in the beret. She seems fun. I would totally want to be friends with her. She could teach me more about Japan and I could teach her things about America.

  11. There Is such a place. Sakura Hotel meet-up. Foreigners and locals. Check out the schedule. I believe you can waive the cheap cover charge if you wear kimono.

  12. The phrase "what if he or she could speak fluent japanese" should be use every time they say language is a barrier, it seems like they dont think is possible that a gaijin can actually speak japanese, i suggest you to ask that question every time they point the language.

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